The spiritual woman and me

It occurs to me, that perhaps it is necessary to be “ a bit more blunt”/ when it comes to this particular relationship.  I am well aware, it is so far beyond the common knowledge or ability to believe for nearly all, that some minimal expression would help you to understand, “maybe, we can simply ignore this person instead of malign and ridicule”.  After all, how can anything you are not familiar with exist?  Right. 
The functional reality herein is NOT to make you more complacent with me/ but to turn you away from discounting the evidence before you, by allowing people to use me for an excuse.  I AM NOT YOUR EXCUSE!  YOU WILL, make your own decision/ and if that decision is not based upon the actual facts that threaten your life: THEN YOU ARE  FOOLS!  Remember that, because I am not in any way or facet of reality a threat to anything but LIARS, THIEVES, ETC.  In no way, a threat to life.
But   I will not be used, and humanity is so damned blind/ it may be necessary to redefine this little “extra area” in the message composition of change or die.  
What is spiritual, is irrelevant to you, since only a tiny few can understand it, or even hear it; there is no consideration or discussion now or in the future. 

That leaves us both with the reality at hand, and its dissemination as to the functional definitions that assume or deny “sane or insane”.  Sane is the acceptance of responsibility, the understanding that my future depends upon my own actions/ reactions/ and decisions.  Therefore to be sane, I must defend my future and my life within the evidence that presents truth, and understands every lie will be prosecuted for the failure it is.  I AM SANE.  Many among you, are not.
To be insane asserts: I do not understand reality, or in some way, have confused the facts of life, with fantasy or delusion.  That is you, by your leaders and university/ NOT me.  Do I lack the competency to know what I write, or consider the results of what I do;   has an intended consequence to society?  This is you, with your abhorrent greed/ it is not me, I do understand what I write and intentionally make that decision. Regardless of the consequences to you or me within the purposes of that writing. It is my decision/ and I do not hide or run away from it.  The verdict upon me is: I am sane/ not insane. 
Therefrom the understanding of a spiritual influence beyond the scope of your understanding DOES NOT substantiate a claim of incompetency in me: rather it identifies a lacking in you. 

As to the fundamental factors that exist, this can only be dealt with under the terms of gender distinct issues that can be considered relevant at this time.  Aside from that fact, one other distinct issue presents itself, as distinguished from the others.  Within the framework of a need to “wedge in”/ where all others in authority would keep me out.  The consequential need is to create an arena wherein the view is more one of ridicule, than it is of substance/ so that the violent will be more amused, than afraid.  War, is not won “by rampaging into battle, waving a flag, singing patriotic songs, and yelling threats”.   War is won, by understanding how to achieve the greatest CRITICAL impact/ while accepting the least cost to yourself. By understanding, what that foundation element is: and what you can do, to defeat it.  That means in the case of an overpowering enemy, it is necessary to buy time, and build the structures that reveal your weapon when that day has come.  The weapon here is:   WE THE PEOPLE, through the first amendment redress of grievances: OUR RIGHT to insist on an accounting from our employees doing our government work/ and make any decision we demand, changing anything we accept responsibilities for, and    Understanding the terms and conditions of the constitution itself, are the laws that will be applied:   UNDER THE TERMS OF A DEMOCRACY CALLED,     WE THE PEOPLE!  The war is, against greed, the effects of fear/ and the failure of men.
There is no more fundamental way to insert myself, into the base structures of power, law, and influence; than to suggest, at this point “I must be, more woman than man”.  How is that not full or ridicule!
But again, the simple truth is:   that is not a lie, under spiritual dimensions and compositions allowed, here in time.  Therefore while being the “most useful” means of disguise, through the elemental paths of building a framework for you to assemble into CHANGE THIS WORLD.  It is also a change growing in me, that I simply cannot refuse.  Complicated or not, it is my reality.

Open your mind, and then learn:   that it is not male that has changed/ the identity of man that lives inside as the base and true reality of my time here on earth, has not changed in the slightest way, apart from an extremely greater awareness in respect, for female in life, than ever before.  Male in me was NEVER in any form against female/ had respect for female, love, hope, desire, and so on.  But in terms of understanding female, or considering any aspect of what it means to be female, or living in any way or thinking in any way that was not male;   was simply “not in me”.  You just can’t imagine the change.
Male is in fact, a linear, rather two dimensional existence that develops under the conditions of order, discipline, respect, courage, and the purpose desired for life under the controls of time.  As men we go from “point a, to point b” and ask only the developmental decisions of is this going to create an environment that will protect, and establish my own presence in this life. Or more simply male is about “building and defending the outside”. It is not much more complex than that.  Just like a penis, on or off/ good or bad/ all done, unless you make a commitment to insure the woman is happy too.

Woman on the other hand appears to me now, to be “something three dimensional” instead. Instead of fundamentally defined by existence, female appears to be the creation of a relationship determined by the inside of life: really different.  Meaning her life is not about building a structural existence or being concerned about defending your territory, etc.  Rather she appears to be concerned about living within that structure, and being protected by the reality men can provide.  Or more simply her life, or the influences on my life, have proven to be FAR LESS about existing with energy and the influences of power/ and far more about living with the freedoms, hopes for life itself, and foundations which make life happy.  It is a complicated environment, and I don’t understand it hardly at all.  Turns out, what is male, cannot understand what is female; and that is simply how it is.  Consequently, in order to understand what is necessary to keep this earth alive, what is female literally has to take over from what is male/ because male does not know the answers.  Our world has changed, because we are so many people!  Now we must change too, because war is not an answer, and women is all we got.  I guarantee, if male continues to lead life on earth, all life will fail. There is no possibility humanity can continue as you are, and not enter HELL, ARMAGEDDON, and then HADES.
Therefrom whatever is female provides the answer to whether we live or die here on earth/ and the acceptance of that reality is REQUIRED, whether you like it or not.  In me too, I don’t know why.
As to my own reality in living; the facts are quite simple.  If I “wander a little too far back into what is male”/ the breasts placed on me start pumping in chemicals, that just cannot be defeated. They will never be “cut off by me”/ these ARE HER CREATIONS, and that would be like asking to go to war for anyone who tried, with her; and I live surrounded by female spirit, not even the slightest possibility of anything to defend myself. She is gaining more power over me, a little more each day.   Breasts change me back quickly to let “female lead/ abandon male”.  Period, no exceptions.  Caught, no escape. It is not more than that, HER plans are RESPECT for women, in exchange for your lives!   And “a toy/ a tool/ or be a woman” for me. Like it or not, there is no escape.  Choose.

To establish my understanding of female as best I can/ I get to experience some aspects of what it is like to be female;   no excuses, no rights, no strength to defend myself, nothing. These things are nearly constant.  Caught, held, imprisoned, etc.  Granting the very limited understanding of what I never considered about female before as:    Just don’t have a choice here.  “It is a new thing” for me/ learn something today.  And I am a POOR student.  Can’t get it together/ you just can’t imagine.
Just breasts all by themselves are so strange.  Whereas a penis was always completely understood and studied to access critical usage;   I ALWAYS understood.  Breasts on the other hand, I don’t understand at all.  They do this, they do that, sometimes just can’t ignore them, sometimes not feeling them at all.  They are just different, “something like moody, or with a mind of their own”/ I DON’T know, DIFFERENT, beyond the scope of my mind.  Just can’t get a grip on what these things are suppose to be or do.  Hard to describe. Not a game, and I am not kidding.  This is not a war/ this is not an attempt to manipulate or control:   this is my life being changed, regardless of the fact I am male. Or at least use to be. The female spirit inside, owns me, and makes it very clear/ she WILL use this body for whatever she desires, and when she does, “the mind goes to female too”. Its just the male identity, that remains as mine.  The “whole idea” of tears in women is becoming much more clear. Like it or not.
Actually quite a few realities I never once considered about what female life was like, have been taught.  NEVER once considered it: was  “male, didn’t need to know”.  But apparently I was wrong.  I don’t know why me.  Just don’t know.

Anyway, there is darn little I can tell you about being female, except that it is not male.  And the consequence of that is, my need to understand female is removing male/ because the life inside, has been altered to believe my eternity will now become female instead of male.  “You CAN’T imagine”/ and I cannot change that back, it is forever. Having recognized, “the male solution” would be a disaster, I prayed for a real solution, for peace and life on earth.  The introduction of a female spirit, (or more correctly: this female spirit found a door in me);  WAS THE ANSWER / there is no other, I searched hard in male; there is no answer there. I had given up on a legal remedy, considering it will take too long/ something had to be done NOW.  But I was wrong, time has been allotted.   Doesn’t make me your savior/ just means, I have a need to help. A desire and purpose more important to me, than male.  Simple as that/ with influences you simply cannot understand.  To understand Spirituality;  “Is like being female instead of male/ you have to live it, to understand it; and you do not.”  Unless you can evict what is not true inside yourself, and not respectful to   GOD,   about your existence in life; you cannot enter.   Humanity will never come into this environment, without truth and respect. Just a simple fact of life.  Even mercy, will demand this at some point.
To understand more clearly, it is necessary for you to grasp what eternity means/ and how it applies to existence as humanity or even as male or female. And that is a long discussion, that is completely useless at this time.  It will not be done.  Regardless, I NEED the spiritual woman who has joined my life, to help you. I NEED the spiritual woman who has changed my own spiritual life to female, to help me survive eternity: I DON’T KNOW how to live this life.  And I live in a changed world, where I have become “the helper” rather than the owner of my own body or destiny.  Just how it is.  End of story, as to the discussion you are allowed to hear.  

The spiritual woman “married to me”, is not a threat to you, or me: only what is male in me.  And I cannot escape, even if I wanted to, and I do not/ therefore a true change is likely, and continues to grow, “just a little each day”. Not because female is better/ but because this is NECESSARY.  I am NOT unhappy; its just gender/ but life is different too, somehow changing in ways I do not recognize (not as male anyway).  Neither male or female is life itself, therefrom nothing here is about death exactly, its just change, a new way of living life itself.   Everything spiritual is about “the purity of truth”.  SHE IS “love and lovely”, demanding complete respect for women.  Demanding women shall lead this earth, because they must. I can and do accept that as necessary.   But otherwise, she is simply helping me understand, what I absolutely cannot understand on my own.  I just can’t do it as male/ I literally need to become “female”, my  acceptance of her is fundamentally “guaranteed”.  Not a choice, “that’s ok”/ but      HARD to do.  Consequently, you “should cherish her” existence in my life/ because she is the difference between having completed this message:   “change or die”/ because the evidence insists.  Or not. What “male in me” had in mind; was very different.
I have love for her, she is not a threat to me/ however this whole female thing,   “Is way beyond me”.  Only time knows how it will end, I do not.  Its not my choice, this is my reality:  That’s the truth.
If its too much for you to bear/ then don’t think about it; because it is not your story of life, it is mine.  And my life is not your life/ therefore what is an influence upon or in me, is not necessarily an influence on or in you.  We are individuals in eternity and in time.  Not, the same.  And I am not your savior/ not your leader/ not your “answer machine”/ or anything else.  Just a messenger in time, who has delivered his message.     
Your life or death, is up to you.  It is not, about me.

The question called love, conceives of destiny not because it is a composition that we desire/ but because it is a development created by two, or more.  Which means simply, our love, is the place we meet together as one.  The destiny created by you and me for ourselves beyond the limits of time. I DO   wish you well.

I, James Frank Osterbur DO, believe in    
GOD   CREATOR OF THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE, AND EVERY LIFE IN IT.      HE   will always be first in my life.   Faith is a decision, a matter of trust.  I have faith, trust, respect, and love in    My      GOD.
JESUS     Savior of this world, NOT by religious decree/ but by the evidence of love, truth, purpose, and a clear ability to KNOW    GOD    That no other living being known has been able to match.  JESUS is the beginning of my search for              GOD    .  My teacher, and friend.
The spiritual WOMAN that has been described in me, is also about truth and love/ the problem being “an opposite experience and expression” than my own;   due to “gender issues”.  That there are male and female realities in eternity, should not be a great surprise to you.  Finding myself on the other side, of my own reality, is a great surprise to me.  I search for balance/ but in the end every truth must be “pure enough” to survive life in eternity. 
I, just do the best I can.  Simple as that.

We all get, “our one chance in time”; regardless what comes of it, or how long that might be.  The choices each person makes determines the truth of who you are, it is that truth in its relationship to thought and energy which fundamentally identifies eternity itself, because what is absolutely true, never dies/ it remains true forever. The ability to conceive of thought beyond the boundaries of time, relies upon “a miracle of composition” that is not compatible with your grasp of body or mind.  But do remember this: that your own body and mind are miracles in and of themselves, and beyond your grasp in time of what is truly happening therein.  Your own understanding is NOT the determining factor, in whether eternity exists.  Remember that, and believe in life.