searching for love


Searching for love; the quest that is eternal.

Love is, the singular essence of a value that can only be shared freely, and without cost or restraint beyond truth. What is true always governs reality, as truth alone gives us the knowledge to survive. Therefore it is a “cost of life”. Love as a shared response within truth, grants trust to become “the survivor” of everything freedom can bring. Love established in freedom, lives in the wisdom of our own chosen disciplines; because order reflects the balance of a shared relationship that gives to me, the same rights and realities as it does to you.  Love holds no judgment for those who have entered within that truth. Love refines and defines the expression of our soul, our elemental essence of “why”; to become the values created within our heart. The experience of love grants family as the place where we shall be “most free”. The heart grants to self, the honesty of respect, for the life I have chosen to share. Love cares, because “I can”. Love shares, because “I did”. Love lives inside, because this is the choice I trust, to bring me hope and happiness, as the beginning of joy! The place where a “life with  GOD”  does occur.

Love is not a chemical moment. Love is not, a freedom without restraint or respect. Love is not judged, it is a passage between our lives, that reveals both heart and truth. Love is, a passion beyond self. Love is, the shared eloquence of two hearts united, in a bond that lifts and elevates our souls as one.



Discipline states:  that love is an essence of existence, that takes from freedom its courage to accept “another life, can be trusted with my own existence”.  Order believes (I want this to be true), that the signs of caring and sharing exhibit the possibilities, that my life will be respected, and even cherished through love. Balance understands, love is not free, for either side;  because the living requires a responsibility and a duty to survival first.

Given these base elements to the creation of love, the value of identifying “someone who will accept me as I am/ someone who will change just a little, because I am valued/ someone, who completes my life, because they value me just as I value them”. Is not related to sex, or possessions, or time:  it is a relationship granted by the spiritual acknowledgement, “shared by our souls, there can be an eternity, waiting beyond these moments”. So the question is, “what could anyone possibly do with an eternity of love”?

Conceived by thought, encouraged by caring, developed through respect:  the value of a life defines itself by happiness through the freedoms to be “whosoever I desire to be”. That gives us purpose in love:  to desire the life, that love gives.

So the question is:  WHAT does desire itself love?  We begin the second quest, which is spiritual by understanding:  the difference between thought and identity is, a relationship governed by love. Thought constructs the destiny, but identity defines value in its own conception of ways, realities, and possibilities to be tried. So freedom discovers a path, individual identities define that path from desire, and fundamental relationships travel between the distance that is heart.

Heart (in its spiritual sense) is the living of a life. What is the rhythm which belongs to your soul? Here we ask the question:  when love is true, there shall always be a desire to accomplish the destiny we seek together. So the value of life and living is the journey into what we find true, in each other.

Truth lives, as the law established, which governs life. Law governs life by limiting the value of freedom to boundaries which will bring peace, happiness, hope, and harmony through justice for all as equals. This is not a description of time, but a relationship with respect:  that achieves both life and living for you, and me/ everything. Therefore love seeks law, by its truth:  because that brings the treasury of our existence into focus, as a destiny found. Find the law, and you found the path into its truth.

Love then stirs the soul, by lighting the way into Creation itself. Every miracle proves Creation/ no living thing is an accident; as is proven by its complexity. Only a true fool says otherwise. So the question is:  having identified that life is a gift, where will respect lead us, by the love that is so clearly evident within that gift.  “without the consequences in competition, of man or woman”.  Simply searching the gift, presents us with love as a participant relationship in our existence. It is the living which acts, reacts, or interacts with that existence, to determine our time. Love and living are not the same.  Love is simple and kind/ living is often not! Love is an expression of value that is accepted as you.  Whereas living is the experience of what can be true, in you. The difference is the relationship we share.

Freedoms construct possibilities, which we accept or deny from the purpose of our lives. That purpose confines us, to the disciplines necessary to achieve the order required “for a quest”. Quest means:  I have found a value worth searching for. Thought means:  I have searched for an expression worth living for. Love means:  I have encountered my soul through you, and given to it, my life. We must not give to each other soul, as that can destroy us. Rather we give to each other the blessing that is soul recognized and shared by the values it gives to us.

Love is a value beyond the recognition of time; because time alludes to the element of death.  Love beyond the limits called death, represents the distance truth can go, within me. The search for love, is then the critical path that finds what is true of me; and lives to discover its entire reality.

The value of “life to life/ as is love to love” releases us both into eternity, as the creation of what we did for each other. The value of time is:  to measure that value, and choose its destiny. The value of love beyond measure:  lifts desire into the essence of a heartbeat, given the instrument that is your love shared. And you mine:  as the rhythm, living inside you and me.

The quest to believe, “eternity has value”.  Is conceived by, the miracle that you are!

Love is, “a many disciplined thing”; life is, “an orderly transition between what freedom means, and what reality will allow; living is, “the balance of our desire, when amended by the purpose to express our truth”.  These three things equal the expressions we will make, and the experience we will share. Of the human values that are recognized by the masses, are rules. Rules exist as morality to direct and command; “you may judge this one, or these, by our rules”; and then we will say you are correct. Rules direct ethics to command;  “you may judge yourself, by our rules”;  therefore you can demand “I am correct/ because the rules judge me as true to you”. Rules however made by men or women do not apply to life, love, or living;  they are merely born by humanity as the means to judge. Life is about the essence of time, which is an expansion that grows with heart/ or dies with hate. While you can judge hate/ you cannot judge heart, as it is the essence of your own desire, and that can change. Love is the journey to achieve the values inherent to an eternal life, it cannot be measured/ therefore it must not be judged. Living is a participation in truth, or the disgrace that lies will bring. What is true is true, and has no means to be judged or measured; because it is true. Therefore only the lies will be judged, and the rules are then only for those who do and intend to: “live with lies”. Therefrom both ethics and morality fail the test of value, because they are merely directions conceived by the masses to identify and create rules for judging you. So that we can punish or worse. In contrast with their rules; are the basic truths of life, by the values of love, and the essence of living: to be free as reality will provide.

The life of a judge, as are so many people who discard the values of freedom; so they may commit themselves to measuring the others to find fault. Finding fault, “lifts me” in my own mind; if lies are your choice. Discarding fault wherever possible to find forgiveness as is needed to value life, “lifts us” as a society, whereby we become at peace, through the harmony of understanding and grace. That does not mean:  “liars/ traitors/ thieves,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ETC” should simply be given a free pass to do anything they desire. Law exists for a purpose, to identify the base foundations, and limit the risk for our future happiness. Rules exist, to measure and demand:  “pay attention to me/ or I will hurt you”. Do you see the difference? Those who pride themselves on being able to judge the others, never look back at themselves: they don’t like what they see. So the mirror only reflects what they want to see, life only hears what they want to understand or accept.

In contrast to that is as an example the life I have lived. There are very few rules, not intended to judge others; but as used to compliment order. There is very little to measure, as the end result of our reality, will be the consequences of what we all do together;  it is a human thing/ rather than an individual thing. Can’t be done, without the masses going along:  therefore unless you attack the masses themselves/ there are no individuals to condemn for the sake of society or humanity: only the essence of what leads. Without ethics, life is the distance we will travel for love, as our own heart decides. Without morality, the living is an example of what we choose to contribute from within ourselves, as the desire of love or hate/ as these are complete opposites, they never “live together”. They cannot “work for the same thing”! Without rules, the purpose of time is to identify and search for truth. Where truth lives, the constant of humanity covers with lies; because they want what they want/ and they choose to play games for pride instead of love. That then requires, and endless uncovering of lies, so that the truth itself can be found:  “a dirty job” at best. Even so, once the truth is located; it can be spread so the rest may benefit without the same dirty job. Alas, humanity chooses to lie for a reason: THEY DON’T want to obey the values of love/ because they do want to exhibit and experience of express both love and hate as a deliberate lifestyle of the vast majority throughout their time on earth. Or more simply humanity as a whole loves “the middle ground”/ as is represented by the herd. At the edges of that herd, are the predators; and nobody “living inside” wants to die; so they pretend “I like it here” instead of freedom. To comfort themselves, “they find want/ search for pride/ or demand power to prove:  I could be god myself”.

While it is true, there are predators at every extreme edge; the freedoms to be gained, and the life to be lived, has a value beyond the herd. So the question becomes:  WHAT are you willing to risk, to belong only to life/ rather than time? The answer to that truth, does have eternal consequences. It is NOT for the many; because the cost is, “you can’t live their life”. Which is why people lie about their own life;  declaring themselves free, when in their heart, they know “it is not true”.  People lie about their love; because the cost of being wrong is too high, and they fail the test “to begin again”; so they settle for whatever they find. People live, at the cost of being wrong; because this keeps them quietly within the herd, unseen & unheard by the predators they fear.

When we travel beyond the masses to experience life as it was intended to be; “without the chains of those who want security”. The reality is, at its core loneliness; because the essence of self, refines living as “bound within the environment, no one can enter; without love or hate”. Thereby love must be found/ or hate will enter in. The search for love is then a journey, a quest to be known by love, and accepted therein. That search will lead you into the spiritual world, where beyond self is identified as the core elemental truth of what you do choose to be. The spiritual world is also full of predators, at its beginning. However once past the tragedy of those who failed themselves/ the lies, cheating, fools, and betrayal of those who found hate:  there are doors into the values of your own heart, that live with the essence of who you are forever more.

Courage is not a fool. Want is not a decision. Lies grant tragedy or tears, not a true direction. Never take a decision away from someone, unless it is hate. Because the value of your own decision creates the essence of what humanity calls heart, or more simply “this is my choice, to be the participant I choose to be/ to create and define as freedom allows my living and my love to be expressed; and then experienced as my choice”. We owe that to each other, it is stealing to take it away. The best we can do, when confronted with: this will be bad for you, “is to give a warning/ or if it is truly necessary, to reveal a tiny portion of what that future will be”. Soul shares love, because it is love.

The question of a spiritual world, cannot be fully examined in any detail; because you have no reference/ thereby have gained no knowledge by which we may expand that conception. The question itself, confronts us as “is there life beyond time”? Some aspect of death must be experienced to enter this world. Thereby it is rare and uncertain:  who can or cannot be true to the elemental comprehension of these things. What is not so uncertain is, the reality of miracles; a body of life is no accident. Would you call your new car an accident of nature, built by something without a brain, arms, legs, or anything else as is the description of evolution? Answer no you would not/ THOUGHT was involved, as was work and a thousand other things which combine into the building, and use of a vehicle! No accident/ nor could you use it “one piece at a time”; as is the second religious decree of evolution. As in no you don’t need wheels, or an engine, or gas or fuel lines, or a steering wheel; etc. OUR BODIES DON’T work properly without every piece in place/ and it doesn’t work at all, when missing a wide variety of independent parts. Go to the nursing home, to see what even a little bit less does mean! Evolution is plainly a “fools’ sewage”/ and the university elite, have you bathing in it; as a cult. Nope, can’t question the leaders/ that is forbidden, they have a book!

Given the reality of evidence upon this earth that is life and environment: we know, this was no accident/ which means it was caused by “an ability to think and work” far beyond our own. It is not a debate, because we cannot build life, or environment to any degree; we just rearrange it to suit ourselves. The essence of thought is spirit, which means wherever there is thought, spirit naturally participates; where a rhythm formed from respect exists. Thought elevates truth, therefore by becoming a participant in truth: we ascend beyond ourselves into that world called thought; through its law. This has no intellectual grasp, as it cannot be measured or won.

Love is a participant in truth, and builds a rhythm of its own; as becomes shared between those who find it. Love expands freedom, to include the values of your heart and mine. Love searches for life, as life itself is the giver of love. Therefore to be a participant in love, we must search for the value in life. That value belongs to soul. Soul is the destiny of love! Therefore the quest to experience and express our soul, lives or dies because of what love itself means to us. The question for every heart is:  do you desire love more than anything else;  through   GOD  !   Here, the decision is:  where does your heart live? Heart means:  my life is alive, when I find the value of truth in me! If your heart does not desire truth, you will not gain the destiny that separates us from the rest: which is a soul. Love is a participant in soul. Love for  GOD is,  a decision of the heart, a passage beyond our self, an identity formed from respect, that expresses the desire to give back some tiny bit of all that I have received. It is not less than that!

To enter within spirit, is to discard this world from your heart; so that life itself, might arise. That is not a judgment upon this world/ it is a decision born inside, that decides the value of life is more than time will allow. Therefore we search, and some fail!

Spiritual means:  truth without exception, by the laws which govern this universe. This is extreme in and of itself/ but by mercy we are allowed to learn the essence of law, through entering individual  “doors”. Each door is a decision, that will not turn you loose unless you learn its purpose, and can define its truth. Thereby you may go through this universe in accordance with what you can do; rather than being sacrificed to what you cannot do. The unfortunate reality is:  many choose the wrong door/ because pride or want or power or sex or whatever it is that is your truth first; interferes and chooses for you. Most die here, and never come back to life. Many more experience FEAR, and in that fear try to escape the realities of truth which cannot be done. If they have not traveled “too far”/ but understand, this is the wrong decision for me; they may be sent back to life: but MOST will suffer mental problems which are many and broad; and be unable to return as “the same”. TRUTH is the only thing that matters in the spiritual world. But without an anchor to keep you sane, when confronted with realities you cannot answer:  you will fail, and may die to eternity. My anchor has always been   “JESUS” as written of in the Bible:  he is, my “guarantor”, that we have not been abandoned by  GOD  .

These are understandings beyond “complete ignorance” as was my first attempt, to find and enter the spiritual realities of our existence:  which means you need not make the same mistakes, as they are costly. Simplified, BECOME YOUR INDIVIDUAL TRUTH, and never guess/ never fear/ never believe; discard pride, refuse want, destroy power from your own life, be responsible for your own decision, it is your choice. CHOOSE RESPECT OR DIE! And enter very carefully, what your heart does desire to know. I entered through many doors, and gained. But try never to be desperate, as leads to want/ as always ends “with consequences”.

As for me, I NEEDED an answer for how to create a message so this world could survive the consequences of human disgrace and disrespect; a reality of humanity by your own decisions in want, cursed by pride, and drowning in power. After a decade of searching through the essence of man; it was clear, man cannot save this world/ this is the best men did do; and we stand on the edge of extinction. Believe it or not! that leaves women to construct a new reality, or life will soon be over forever; because the evidence is quite clear:  WE CANNOT SURVIVE THIS!

Alas, I needed women to help, but they would not: which left me to search for and find “the door” that leads to the spiritual truth of women. I honestly thought, I would be able to understand; but it was not so/ and my life has changed. Even so, the reality of this work over the last dozen years or so, is DIRECTLY  and DISTINCTLY  a product of both male and female within my existence on this earth. ITS COMPLICATED;  a reality I would strongly urge no male to follow (even if you could/ and you cannot). My truth however is this: nothing in my heart desired more, than to give this world a chance for change; as my own gift “back to  GOD “ for the life I have known. Therefore it was “worth the price”/ as I have in fact done that very thing. Believe it or not! NEVER believe the spiritual world is a game. NEVER believe it is a reality that you will not be forced to enter: death will demand it/ so prepare!

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Jim Osterbur

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