A letter “to whom it may concern”.

It is my reality, that the last 8 hours or so, have been far less than desirable; a cost of being me. What is clear is, that you will never understand the “changed”, basic definition of my life which is; I must, now live in a way that woman would recognize as “self”. Even though, I cannot; other than to experience the same levels of “most realities with men”, as do they: by changing positions with woman. As described earlier: my job is to create information that would be valuable to women. I cannot do that as a woman, from her perspective; as that is impossible. I can only create information that would be consistent with a man; that is confronted by realities he can no longer control. “its complicated, and unpleasant”. As are these tits of mine, that have used up the word “wow”; and replaced it with “a thousand plus hours of pushing against my body to come out”. Seriously, if women endure one hundredth of this; they should receive true respect and a reward. Just for having female breasts.

So the question is: WHAT can I tell you about men, that would be valuable to women; preferably without doing damage to either. By not interfering in “nature’s way”. Since some know “many things about men”/ and some know nothing about men; I, will just add it all.

  • Until a boy finds himself, confronted by the fact: a penis is not a toy/ bad things can potentially happen, from not recognizing the chemicals of sex; will lead you into “complete selfishness”: if you do not recognize the consequences, and control them. That occurs when, you find yourself where you never intended to go. Thank GOD, for decisions (stop_); rather than simply failing. The reality of this is widely varying, but until the recognition occurs that a penis is not a toy, and the chemicals are not to be allowed control; he cannot be a man. Because a true man (as created) exists, as the representative of GOD on earth. Being an animal fails that value.
  • Girls want sex just as badly as boys; chemicals are chemicals, and they are addictive, until you control them. the difference is primarily, that boys are expecting to participate in this world, with freedom to try “everything they can, or desire too”. While girls are apparently demanding their participation is a freedom, to achieve the security of a male partner, so as to make life less scary, in the real world they face. The consequence of that is, girls chain boys with sex/ while boys live to compete with other boys for trophies. In this conflict, the reality of sex and its consequences comes due for all those who did not achieve that understanding before. Not a game.
  1. Young men who love their young woman; will be torn between that love, and their own freedom to choose and experience the future by their own design. As the reality of marrying someone, is to remove that freedom, and reestablish it, as our choice. But not even our choice, because we are just beginning this living of life; and must compete to achieve our own securities. Where risk is bordered by the consequence: “we simply cannot afford to be wrong”. Therefore the reality is, we cannot afford to be right either, and life becomes simple. While young women have their own trophies to accumulate: which does include babies for most.
  • Living the married life, depends upon all the lies that were used to get you both to this stage of decision. Trust determines the future, and the future determines how well you will be able to love each other. Without truth, there is no respect. Without respect there is no relationship. Without a relationship there is no love. Without love, all you have is an agreement for sex or possessions or trophies.
  • Every decision is a personal matter, it is not a joint account, whereby each may steal from the other because the value of your heart is unprotected. The heart, is yours alone/ while the soul can be shared. Each decision takes something from your life, and uses it for someone or something else to become a part of your life. That means: you must make that decision for yourself honestly/ or there will be blaming of the other person. A reality that will descend into the abyss of what I want/ or what I didn’t want. That separates individuals, by pride or power; into a battlefield experience. WAIT, for the truth to decide (shared)/ not selfishness, “I own it all”.
  1. There are the issues of finding a mate after high school, when the realities are far less desirable; unless you go to college, “where you can continue to play like a child”. If you are forced into reality, as are most/ then you must accept the responsibility to meet and greet “at least one hundred people on average”. Because finding a lifetime mate who is the “perfect match for you”; is no small endeavor. That is complicated: because sex enters in, and the reality of loneliness can change the decisions you will make.
  • Meeting and greeting people REQUIRES communication, and a realistic presentation of who you are, as body, heart, and mind. We are programmed to desire someone who is healthy in both body and mind. We are each one desiring of someone who can make us smile with the desires of their own heart. Therefore it is incredibly important, to be who you are, so as not to lie. It is incredibly important to present yourself as both healthy in body and mind; which does include cleanliness, realistic weight, and more. THEN COMES COMMUNICATION, which is earned by accepting of the fact, that to bond with each other, we must have something in common to talk about. We must allow each other to be heard, without judgment. We must find a destiny or a desire we can share, to continue the journey into another day. So you need to expand your world into whatever does interest you, so that you can share that information honestly. You need to recognize where (find people with an interest you can accept) and how to meet single people; which does include safely participating with others, even if it is just to meet their friends or family or coworkers. Because that is the price we pay.
  • In terms of sex; the reality is simply this: never do what is not acceptable to you. Never do what you do accept, and then complain “I didn’t do that”/ because it is not true. And truth decides your reality and your future. From the male perspective: sexual acts require “a bit of work”/ that is well worth the price. But a selfish man or boy will not pay it; because he just wants to play with his toy. So he will be quick, and uncaring; its called lust (I just want to use your body, you don’t matter much). Which means the woman if she stays is because you represent “what she can, or expects to buy with sex”. That is called shopping; which means you don’t matter much, I just want your possessions. Where there is love, there will be passionate (my heart sings for you), caring (my soul lives with your embrace), sharing (my joy, is your happiness), and grace: the disciplines of my heart are in rhythm with you.
  • Loneliness is a very different reality than sex, which is commonly used to cover loneliness up, and keep it hidden: so as to appear “healthy”. Loneliness is: “my heart is wounded/ my soul is cast aside to rebuild itself, with so little love left inside, that it cannot.” So we must ask: what is heart, and why does it fail when we need this most? We begin with loneliness itself: as the description most understood, by the darkening world surrounding us, without a visible escape (depression)/ without a visible friend to share this burden of “a future I cannot accept as my own”. The heart is: a world beyond self, where eternity lives, and life never measures or judges anyone. The home, where my future is inevitable. Soul is: the place where I am never alone, as all creation itself, worships this life we are given with me. To impart the values of a destiny, is to remind the miracle of life that is dying inside: never to judge, because that fact “removes the light, to see beyond yourself”.
  1. As time passes by, people do change into the identities they will inhabit forever; even if they make no commitment/ then that is their identity, even if it cannot survive. Some change much/ others change little: how that affects the people who have loved you or shared life with you, is entirely dependent upon them. Because when truth comes, it is true, and cannot be changed further. There are sexual realities which become included in long term relationships: some will grow to hate sex/ some to love sex/ others will want little, or be denied; and so on. Children, work, wants, pride, and other consequences of life, do change things as well. What you each, are willing to share defines your happiness. When you are each willing to care enough: to do what makes the other happy, creates a destiny.
  2. Fate is the decision, to just assume and thereby gamble instead of facing your own reality, and accepting the terms of what it will cost; to be what you desire to be. Since most fail at that: the constant of human existence is people lie; especially to themselves. Lying to yourself means you are not willing to accept the price that must be paid to be “what you believe you want to be”. Or simply don’t believe you can be what you truly want to be/ so fantasies arise. With these lies, drugs come; crime is exhibited; violence and hate arise; and behaviors that are intended to tear someone else down, are common or constant; even if you don’t personally voice them. Because “you want, what you want”/ and you don’t want this, whatever it is.
  3. In every understanding of freedom: even if you feel enslaved, there are choices you did make. The consequence of religion does appear, as the dignity we share in determining for ourselves: “WHAT will happen, when I die”? That is a foundation upon which our lives are built. So the sooner you make that decision, the sooner your true future will commence. If you build upon a lie/ that lie will collapse, and you will drown. If you build upon the evidence of truth/ then the potential to survive as the truth you chose will exist. But if your truth is in fact simply a disguise, that disguise will eat your future alive, and you will fail. Hate is a truth that exists only to describe the living as: “you stole my life”. That is a lie, but since hate only recognizes their own death; it does not matter to the hateful. Love is a truth, that lets each experience the expression, “I AM ALIVE”; and wonder about just how much more value life could be. Truth is a foundation of law, and the law decides what will become of us all: within GOD’S mercy.
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Jim Osterbur

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