no balance


Nothing, compares with life.

Which is why, the framework of living is so elementally sacred, and respect is literally what we owe to our existence.

Universities (your former classmates hiding under the disguise of a diploma) have done everything they could do: to destroy that/ defile that/ curse that/ mutilate that/ hate that/ and seek the vengeance of complete destruction for this world, and all that lives/ or could ever live from this moment on. Bringing to this world; their own cult of superiority, as is “we CAN play god”; To their eternal shame.


Nonetheless, our only option to remove that influence; has been regulated and denied by all forms of authority in this USA; to removing their claim of superiority. Thereby allowing truth and reality to resurface and defend both life and earth. Fortunately, although NOT without true costs: the evidence of their failures, the consequences of their foolishness, the curse of their lies, theft, cheating, fraud, disgrace, death, betrayal, terrorism and more is creeping from under the covers; to be revealed as “not gods/ just DEVILS (anything to curse you)” instead.

That said; and the ranks and file of their universities cult: “in an uproar of we are gods/ damn you, for discounting and denying our authority”. Believe whatever they want to believe; no matter what the evidence does reveal. Pushing back with: WE CONTROL THE COURTS/ WE CONTROL MEDIA/ WE CONTROL GOVERNMENT/ WE CONTROL IT ALL; and accept no disobedience, from a slave.


Nonetheless the mutilation of life, by genetic alteration and mixing of species to create the great pandemic of death that is coming; throughout all species. “biblically called Armageddon”. Rising from the ruins of what they did to life.

Nonetheless the reality of trying to ignite a nuclear fire (the only thing a tomak reactor can do) may soon occur; causing this earth to turn into a sun; incinerating all life with a flame 4 million times greater than the fire we know as on earth. No going back, once ignited: life and earth are deceased.

Nonetheless the reality of resource losses; just to throw your trophies into the garbage/ are monumental. And completely without justification; other than “we want them ALL dead”/ we want EVERYTHING FOR OURSELVES; as is the cost of those who claim to be rich. But are just failures to life and world.

Nonetheless, with counterfeiting throughout this world; discarding all respect for reality/ destroying all the securities from human life and work forever/ disease-ing & dismantling governments into war, and claiming future lives will pay; as indeed they will.

Nonetheless, with endless weapons of mass destruction; which are certain to be used as the millions and billions of people soon to be starving and thirsting to death: form wave after wave of people who literally have nothing to lose. Because they are dead, without water or food; and it is all ending forever.

Nonetheless, with reality proves; at a birth of 3 more infants born than deaths in a year: per one hundred people. The addition of one quarter of a billion more people are added; per year onto this world. All needing/ all wanting/ all fighting; “for more”. While those who have something say: “we can’t/ or we become just like you”. And it won’t work; because more and more and more keep coming; with no end in sight. Certain death of this world.

Nonetheless, with all life dead in the oceans. With the climate beyond recovering. With the atmosphere disconnecting from our planet to become like other planets in this solar system “with 700+ mph winds”. Because you cut down every forest/ causing the extinction of every plant and life. Removing every base element of food existence throughout the chains of life which kept our world alive; and what seems like a billion more; the possibility of our survival is very small.

Yet unless we try; it is certain “short term”: death coming, for all. And yet the universities say; we are gods/ claiming they know MORE than all the rest. But killing a world, because the crust of insanity rules their heart; if even more than a dead skeleton (nothing left but lies) as are rampaging on earth.

The critical truth

of life or death on earth; is not a relationship

with whatever you want. It is not a game, as is the claim of pride. And it is not the result of power; although that constructs extinction.

As is the cult of the insane, and even less; called “universities”.

So to recognize what is the critical truth of life

we must look beyond the cult of the dead;

and find ourselves within the energy which forms life;

by the thought which is life.

Thought being; “not an intellectual conception”.

But a true universal relationship

with the essence of freedom

as is achieved by the recognition of what the limits and boundaries of living with energy are.

Energy does not die, unless it is dissipated into an expanse so vast, it can no longer be found.

Energy does change its relationship with mass, when confronted with realities of consequence; that will alter those limits and boundaries beyond the current environment; within which it is bound.

Therefore beyond self is a recognition of change.

Or more distinctly

ENERGY IS NOT; the kinetic result of motion, as claimed by Einstein. E=mcsq [mass times speed as a constant]

ENERGY IS: the reality behind why, the freedom of motion exists.

More distinctly; you cannot claim the cause of energy is motion/ unless you define what or why the cause of energy (being able to move) exists.

For every action there is a reaction/ UNLESS, that action is so extreme; no reality of existence lets a reaction occur: which is eternal by its conception. Therefore we know; that eternity lives within an energy realm so far beyond our own; that it is not comprehensible to us.

Nonetheless, we begin with the certainty: that when the motion of time has been set free. The resultant reaction occurs, from what is stationary; thereby repelling what moves forward/ instead of reacting in a backwards motion as would be consistent with time.

We then assemble: the greatest power (this can make you) of this universe in time; is cold.

But unless the energy of life; is our relationship with heat; cold has no element of destiny. Time accepts: life with destiny, as the rise from freedom recognizes, “without love, life fails to have value”/ the ascension begins, as destiny forms a home, when love exists.

In contrast: some fall into the chaos of hate, which keeps the consequences of death at bay. Wrestled by violence; to the concept of “I can play human god (I am more/ you can’t get me; FEAR this) than you”: constructs fate.

Living Time: is our relationship with heat.

But life itself; is our relationship with energy. Do you see the difference?

Heat is a transference of energy into the physical dimension of movement.

Life is the developmental freedoms, known or conceived as, the elemental base foundation of “human thought”. Which says: “movement is life”.

So we ask the question: what does freedom really mean/ if movement itself, is simply to be conceived by time?

Critical to this

is the change from existence as thought becomes life;

to the relationship of freedom equals movement as time.

WHAT does existence therefore mean?

Change, creates life.

So the critical question is: WHAT does change to produce existence in the form of a relationship, with the foundation of energy itself?

Limits and boundaries; are all you get.

You may decide these for yourselves.

Let us conceive of destiny instead.

ASKING; if life recognizes life/ then what is death?

There are several distinctions in death.

Disassembly of existence

dissolution of participation

discovery of war, against life itself

and the decision to “make war”, against GOD

in contrast: there are only two distinctions of life:

the full freedom of values released from time

and the identity known as time, from which your truth will arise.

Where an action/ constructs a reaction: change is possible.

But where truth is truth; that truth cannot be changed; because it is, what it is. Therefore no change is possible. Although the biblical theory is: that tragic choices can be covered up; by presenting the value of your repentance in those things. Which is called mercy.

DESTINY is our relationship with Creation

or more distinctly; since we are not gods in any form or conception. The reality of our lives is based upon the truth of what

does or does not exist; beyond time, and its environment called self?

So existence is critical

but cannot conform to an environment beyond time.

Because our relationship with time is an action and reaction/ rather than the more extreme speeds from which no relationship to time exists. Or more simply: time must be removed, in order for eternity to exist; and that includes the environment called self.

So we ask the question: if there is no self/ then how can there be an identity; true or not true that survives?

More conceptually true however is

an environment need not be limits and boundaries, if the dimensions which conceive of it; conform to thought, rather than a physical presence as is time.

Energy however does require limits and boundaries

to shape its response.

So we become assembled, by the destiny of values confined by love; “the dimensions of heart”.

And we are bound within the energy that functions to create freedom, as eternity: “conceived within soul”.

The beginning search for life, therefrom is:

WHERE can the purity of our truth expand?

HOW, can the essence of our own love create a new living?

WHO will truth let us be?

WHEN does freedom become mine?

WHAT is to be “my home”/ created in love?

WHY, can I accept: life will go on?

As reality proves each of these things; are beyond the conception of self.

Within the framework of life on earth;

is the truth of MIRACLES. Every living thing designed by thought.

A world suited to life; every possibility worked by energy in conjunction with thought.

Every aspect of freedom, recognition of life or body or self or existence or time or anything: is strictly the result of “thought”/ regardless of limits or boundaries you set into place.

Which grants to those who choose to be alive in love; the gift of “heart and soul” as love expresses; in our respect

as the gift we give back to our Creator.

Not one single thing about life, nature, world, child, or other is accidental in its construction. Clearly thought provided it all.

Not a single atom of evolution is proven; only their claim “this looks like that”. Which some does; because “with billions of lives” involved; even you can see a relationship with what needs to be “simple”.

And the people say: WE GOT RELIGION for that!

The belief, in whatever we want to believe.

Or more distinctly: the search for what we can believe, based upon what we do know/ don’t know or can interpret as “defined by life”.

Its called belief; because it fills in all the gaps; between life/ death/ and eternity; “with what we decide, we want that to be”. Good or bad.

So people search, for a relationship beyond self; that allows them to accept what they believe to be true. Or as the cult of universities play god pretend: it is, to accept universities know/ therefore we have decided “the herd, should live here”. For safety.

More distinctly, the religion of university is: want/ pride/ and power; allows us to believe that time is just time/ and self is just self/ and we owe nothing to nothing, for our lives; because this is all we get. Since it is all we get, and we die to dust; we get to do anything we want with life or its death. If we can prove “power” to do so.

Religion is divided into sections

those who believe in love versus those who believe in hate

and all the variations in between these two opposites of reality.

Religion provides: the base framework of every generation, for thousands of years. As have conceived of more than just self. Therefore it is, “the best men did do” with regard to life and death and the miracles which form the evidence of “not just here, or time is not just time”.

The critical difference between the agnostic religion of universities (want is all we own)/ the atheist religion of human animals (time is all we get), and the foundation of all other religion which is belief in something other than man. Is direction. Hate leads into chaos/ love searches for life/ and the agnostic plays god or collects trophies, trinkets, and toys; to explain life is “whatever I want it to be; and can buy”.

Or more simply: hate fights to survive, the chaos; by transferring that chaos onto someone or something else; as in “fear me”. The agnostic lives to survive, by believing they can play god with life or living by making it a game; in various ways. The religions of love search for life, and find in their belief; whatever it is they want eternity to be; by obeying the rules.

Truth however knows none of these things; as they are not functionally the decision that brings forth either love or hate.

That decision is:

I find life in me; and I value its presence as my soul.

Those who accept this destination; find love, and all that ascends with it. Into, the creation of life, clearly assembled on this world; for our view.

Those who do not fall from love into the various traps and games they turn life into; to avoid the consequence of death (I, ended).

HEART now creates from love,

the values of our identity.

Or hate defies death; by assembling “fear/ believe/ obey”; in you.

The difference is direction.

The value is respect shapes us with love.

Whereas hate is shaped, by the violence you chose.

The fate that comes with changing nature with mutilation of genetics. The fate that comes with trying to ignite a nuclear fire.

The fate that comes; from believing universities can play god.

Which ultimately identifies the cost of being wrong; is so extensive: you can literally lose your connection with body.

Which then forms the basis: for eyes that don’t work/ arms and legs that fall off; or simply don’t connect with your brain/ or a billion other realities of life; by its death of horror.

Inflicted by those who had no respect/ but believed they could play god. Because they did change something.

For the truth of miracles; beyond doubt: you chose not to care.

How I truly wish, it was not so.

And the people scream: “not me”/ I just wanted what I wanted. They did it all/ “I just stood by, and didn’t care at all.”

Cause you know: I wanted “a yacht/ a billion dollars/ ten houses/ and all the things that destroy: life and living for every child. HURRAH for me.

The alternate

let us define our relationship with heart, the basis of a life built with joy and the intent for happiness in our living.

More distinctly; what has value, shapes the decisions which become identified with our living. When we are happy, “life is a blessing to me, and to us”; the rhythms of sharing and caring construct a home. Where we both understand; “I am happy, because of you”.

Or more distinctly: the opposite of me/ is we!

While living occurs outside of “we are happy”. The reality of me is commonly governed by want, pride, and power; which takes far more than it gives to any life or world reality. Enforcing “I am the superior one here”.

The rhythms of “we”, are utterly different than “me”. Whereas the living is not confined as self. But identified with joy, as being family, and living within home. The journey need not be selfish here, because we choose to live as one shared existence, by helping each other to be happy. That foundation of surrendering selfishness, to participate within the values that give life its meaning/ rather than its toys, trinkets or trophies; is a relationship with respect.

Respect means: to accept, I am not here alone/ and the value of your contribution to my life is more than I can honestly measure. Therefore I will just say: I do respect what you chose to do for me, and for us; as the honesty conforming to love.

So it is here, we encounter true love; where respect controls our decision to accept truth decides/ not want, pride, or power.

But the ascension of values, grants a living beyond self, that is filled with respect for the miracles of life and earth and truth.

Love shapes the future/ or hate destroys it, with chaos.

Simple as that. Life does go one direction or the other/ based upon what people choose.

Love honors life, as the values of happiness and security, we do share; proving we do care. By living within the respect all who make this decision deserve.

The unfortunate truth of human existence is;

That the consequence of living, requires our survival. And the realities of survival, give to some more power and pride than the others. Which makes want; an uneven scale of possessions and power; that do make a difference, here in time.

So love as is the values of happiness, hope, courage, truth, trust, heart, respect, and more; are confronted with the realities of hate and death. Hate being the violence, destruction, betrayal, terrorism, murder, chaos, mutilation, and so much more; to prove “life be damned”. Along with the end of life being: a flattened statement (no options exist) of “this will never be again”.

So the question is: will love decide in you? The rest do not matter, to your identity of truth; only you decide this.

And the people say; “those who hate or survive” have more/ they are the winners. And even in losing; they have revenge; to keep them working.

While love lifts all of society with respect.

Hate destroys all of society, with greed, power, pride, lust, selfishness, lies, cheating, theft, traitorous decisions and terrorism as we see in “universities lead now”.

And the cult forms behind “university is god”/ as our reality proves, by the evidence; to be “so true”. Ending with extinction, because that is the consequences of what you chose.

Which brings us back to love: which means, I cannot force you to accept the values of life or respect. I can only offer you, my hope, my values of living within what is beautiful; because it is more, than the eyes can see. The truth of survival itself, because the law shapes life and living within the boundaries and limits of what we can do, for ourselves. And for each other. But if all you conceive of is want. Then all we can share is time. But alas/ or with gratitude; love does not share anything with hate, other than time exists here. So we share not; when love fails in you.

Even so; the boundary and framework of our existence on earth is. That we are all equal. That we must forgive when repentance (I will do it no more) is honest and true. And the cost of letting this world die; is beyond the cost of testifying, not only is this unfair to life, world, and child. It will be your own extinction/ and even your own cost of consequences; as is YOU chose to destroy an entire living world of CREATION. To your eternal shame and failure.

Love is not a reward, it is a shared existence among those who care. Even if the search for love, lacks participants:

it is our duty, to continue on, with value, truth, trust, hope, respect, courage, and especially love.

NOT WITH STUPIDITY/ nor surrendering life to those who failed.

But simply serving as the reminder: love exists/ it is your choice. BUT, it is their choice as well.  Reality accepts, “I will go first”/ so that you may understand the difference.

Do not forget that; freedom is an inherent value of truth.

In contrast

the curse of the damned, are upon you/ the sorcerers/ witchcraft (plague of evil); fueled by playing god with life and earth; have formed a tsunami of death, swelling up from the earth itself; to consume you.

Because you allowed the universities to claim they are superior to nature and to GOD and to life itself.

To your eternal shame.

And the army of the dead scream: WE WANT WHAT WE WANT/ while reality turns to look behind that army, to see the wave of destruction; you chose. As the consequence of continually shouting; “let them go to HELL”/ we DON’T care.

The cemetery of death, begins/ as the tragedy of consequences expands. Asking the question: did their vaccine/ your belief, do this? Should the medical system be overwhelmed: those beyond the age of 69 shall be discarded, other than for little things that you do have a cure for. The nursing homes, shall be emptied: you had your time: the children and those who support them; come first. Until reality allows for relief.

there are literally NO “developing nations”; with a large military presence/ NOR is there any form of “value to be supported”, in any form of threat. That represents a crime against life on earth.

in terms of balance; we should recognize simply: “that GOD our Creator” can literally do anything “HE desires”. But that has little to do with our own choices. Or more distinctly: GOD is not a vending machine, whereby you say your “magic abra cadabra words”/ and your assumed slave which is the Creator of all this universe; magically does whatever you ask. To your shame, you believe this; endlessly.

Instead existence is the gift of life, and life can make choices for the living; which then become directional, and conceives of a destination; infiltrated by values not necessarily our own. The spiritual world is different than time; and operates within different levels of interference; defined by needs, but orchestrated by truths. It is a boundary between time and eternity; which focuses on truth, in favor of life/ but not individual lives. Truth protects life/ laws defend existence: values create desire. While I have declared: “the spiritual woman inside of me”/ is a reality depicted in biblical prophecy by Revelation 12. The reality of it, is unlike anything else: as I was “introduced” into the female dimension: which makes me “an impurity” of their existence. So the laws are different; even though, this was done in favor of life, because of threats: a choice, just to ask a question/ with consequences other than self. “complicated, in truth; as she needed an opportunity as well”! Love governs the direction of my life, and hers; therefore same elemental journey as all love:  “is never hate”. Nevertheless, truth survives; and love can be wrong. Therefore truth decides, the direction love must take to survive; as life or world. We share the journey, but since I failed life (knowledge is not enough) on earth: she now controls. 

To your shame: “no, this has nothing to do with claiming; nature was wrong”. This is the cost of a world facing extinction, and the realities of what could be understood; discarded for your want, pride, and power. Given a different view of life: the elemental progress of this work, became more distinct. To your benefit, not to mine. What is a world worth? Far more than “strictly male”. NO, not savior: but just like you, THE DUTY to fight for this world; is not limited to want, pride, or power. Love lifts the soul, and  the heart must reply: the whole Creation has a need/ what can I do, to help! It is not my job, to wander why. Instead;  wisdom allows, “that by joining male and female intimately together in this work”; in ways beyond the comprehension of time. We cannot escape each other, or hide, etc! The realities of what needs to be done, will become more distinct and clear; for life on earth to understand; as one balances the other, reality proves what is true. The difference however is: “its woman’s” turn to lead. Whether I complain or not. The true quality of this work, has in fact; been greatly enhanced since we were joined; proving the value that is:  working together as one. That however has been largely discontinued; when I tried to leave. “its complicated”. The end result is not: either humanity will change/ or you will soon be extinct. Simple as that.

My own life has been changed some by the consequences over which I had little control/ but in the end, the values inherent in my own choices benefited by this change in direction. Nonetheless I would not call this an intervention by GOD ;because that assumes I would know/ I certainly do not. But it is clear in the living of my life; that realities can be shifted, and destinies can be changed: by laws beyond my own comprehension. I do not regard that as anything other than living, as best I can. IF GOD intervened, that is literally “HIS business” so to speak/ as I am, as are we all: a miracle destined by “change and choices made”. Love is, the only true treasure, of this universe; that can never be changed. Therefore to join the living, you must be a participant in love; as the destiny of your thought, defined by your truth, as choices reveal. Honesty requires: that you should understand, “LIFE IS” MORE complex than those simple answers. Life intervenes; as is different than time; reshaping the future/ regardless of personal decisions made. But what you should never forget is: these are not decisions of self, nor dimensions of control. Instead truth allows, for those who belong to truth; a path more intricate than time does reveal. It is NOT, for the masses/ but exists only among the few. 

Whether our world is to live or die; is NOT up to us to decide. Whether we fight to keep our world alive, and remove the changes made, particularly by universities; which threaten our own extinction; IS ENTIRELY UP TO US/ as is, the concept of you and me. We all die, simple as that/ none escape. Therefore, what happens then, literally is: what matters most.

I suppose, reality requires: that my own existence need not be as complicated as I state it to be. While you will not understand most of it/ you will understand: that my tantrum (the evidence does not predict this humanity will learn and change)/ let me go. Was not valid, and referenced my mom had died a little earlier; and having told her years back: when asked, “that to become more aligned with what truth as love would desire her to be; some small amount of change would be necessary”. While she considered that carefully for a time/ pride overwhelmed, and she never really talked to me again, up to her dying day. Same was true of my dad; pride overwhelmed him too; after a time of reflection; and both sought “to find me at fault instead”. So even if reality forced humanity to change/ pride was still in the way, making the work less than likely to succeed.

Even so; after my tantrum was rejected; and I learned not only was I at fault for trying to discard an entire living world, for my own self interests. I also learned, that the young man helping me “a bit”/ needed me to be more than just selfish, and intertwined with myself. Which reminded me: don’t be so damn stupid/ wake up. The spiritual woman inside; added in to that; requiring since, that I would look at life from the more literal view of a woman/ to see within that reality, this is no game. Tragedies exist/ lives even for an eternity are lost/ failure is pandemic/ and fools lead into death. But every life on earth is facing extinction; and no one is excused. Which means; whatever my part in that is or will be; must be accepted as without an excuse.

So, while I am certainly a long way from “perfect”/ I do try to be adequate for the job given to me. Whatever that is. “its all I got”/ therefore it is all I can give. Pick yourself up and do the best you can as well: it is your duty to life and world. NO, I do not know, how it will all turn out/ not my job. NO, I do not know; what will or will not happen to me. NO, I do not know where “in eternity” I may or may not fit; everything is turned “inside out”/ no longer a clue. NO, there is no homosexuality in me/ never was/ nor is there some type of transgender issue; I don’t accept fantasies or delusions, only reality. But I cannot say, where my body or life will go from here; as my soul lives within the spiritually female world/ and my body lives in time as male; and I am now at the mercy of whatever “female” is going to decide. As the partnership of 12 years or so, has been dissolved; from my trying to leave. She has made it absolutely clear: I am NOT in charge anymore. That is “complicated”, and I truly don’t know how it ends. In effect: “the balance” is gone/ and I am at the mercy of whatever she decides. I cannot say that is “ultimately fair”/ because it is not. But we do both know: that life or death of an entire living world, is far more valuable than I. Simple as that, no more interfering/ her decision now. Which is ultimately OK, because I tried and failed; but the end result of it is: we both, still have to do, the best we can. Her turn to try. Because you, humanity on earth: is so arrogant, as to be truly deaf and blind to life itself. Little is more conclusive of that, than the claim of evolution/ nothing is more certain of that; than to allow those trying to ignite a nuclear “lets burn atoms”; turning this earth into a sun. a true, SATANIC delusion. Wake up, or you will be extinct.

I failed with men: because the constant disgrace of men is, when confronted with a threat: they either run away to hide/ or they start screaming “fear me or us” instead. Never once accepting the fact; this is bigger than self. I cannot say what women would do; as I have had, no real sustained working relationship with them. And there were other problems with that.

We failed with men and women; because with ridicule of me, a threat that you made yourselves fades into the rhetoric of “he ain’t nothing but a fool”. Even when you can’t support that; arrogance needs no reality.

Women are afraid of all men; with very few exceptions; because differences in strength make it so: they error on the side of caution. But in this case, that is absolutely wrong: because truth does not care what you are afraid of/ it is what it is; and our world is truly in danger of complete collapse into extinction, by the choices humanity has made. So your fear is worthless, and your claim of safety is futile at best.

What I can clearly tell both sides is: without real world cooperation between the sexes, there is no future for life or earth. I would warn every man: that trying to “be selfish”/ has very serious consequences. As with me; inescapably tied to female now, but still stubborn; resulted in “now she is really pissed off”/ and fighting back; and I am losing. Which does ask the question: could I be influencing her eternity; a reality I would never wish to do. So, don’t do that; we must walk together, we must find a way to respect and value each life; or change to become as if one life. “that is complicated”. Instead of wandering about me: understand what justice means, and choose fair play for all; because you owe that to life and earth. Be KIND to women, BETTER than the past; and lift life back into respect for the value we did receive as life and earth. Humanity is the problem/ humanity is the solution by changing humanity from arrogant; into “a living human being alive in the grace of miracles”. As is the truth of our gift, our given destiny; as a life in this world.

Universities stole that from you/ but until dead, you do have a chance to begin again. but you swallowed their puke and vomit, and let them teach your children with the vile disrespect of arrogance instead of truth.

EVERY LIVING THING, IS THE GIFT OF THOUGHT, and you know it is true. Because not one hair on your body, can be made by you; or your universities/ not even one; and there is no such thing as accidents bring order, balance, or disciplines by law; to life. That is beyond ignorance, to absolute denial: because you want, what you want/ instead of respecting, what is true.

Nonetheless, IT IS TRUTH that builds life and sustains it with thought, and that truth lets us survive, even without thought; as is the evidence of human life. But your truth of today is: with a thousand disrespectful decisions/ that led to a billion consequences of death: your time on earth is now limited, and being lost forever.

The claim of spirituality is beyond your comprehension: but I say again, TRUTH builds based upon thought/ and thought is the basis of law, that allows truth to survive. Therefore truth is integral to life, and that means the journey back into truth, can be found through the search for life itself. Don’t be so damn stupid; find your brain.

The overriding factor, between every male and female relationship is: “when want is removed/ only then does truth decide”. Without respect on both sides, there is no relationship. Consequently you know, if a future does exist. Love shifts hope, into “your version of truth: surely it must be so/ or it cannot be so”; depending upon your own true desires, and the limits of your trust. But desire is not truth, it is an environment you created to support the happiness you hope to create. Unfortunately, we must match each other, to create a true self, from each one. Only truth can do that, if each will surrender to some degree of change. If not, pride takes control, and ends the heart (the rhythm of love) by placing barriers between “you and me”.

TRUST binds us together, and that is built only from truth; as pieces of a puzzle, placed together by love. If you break trust, love fails. But if it was a lie, and you chose trust anyway: you will find heartbreak (part of my life, has been lost in you).

Only truth, is fair to love; because it seeks a reality born of respect. Where lies exist, want seeks to steal what it wants; respect does not exist/ want does, and pride will follow, where wants succeed.

Live your life with passion, because it is YOUR life, and you owe that to yourself. Open the door where respect does exist; because a friend is worth the price. Perhaps even more. Honor values of love. Discipline desires of sex/ learn what it means to be fair. Order allows us to learn: the cost of what living together will be/ which does include sex. And balance the definitions of your happiness, within the realities life does present. Some lives are hard/ some are easy/ some are tragic/ and some are happy with little cost; and you know not what the future shall hold. BE GENTLE with each other, most everything we get was a gift/ but not with hate. Remember; to be individuals instead of a herd of animals; there MUST be differences. It is that simple.

as for me, and my relationship with “spiritual female, as a truth beyond time”; only time itself, will decide the evidence of what we can be, as one. I don’t know. I don’t know what eternity would be. I just plain don’t know; its complicated. She still refuses, to let me inside; where the essence of life exists; to see, what our future could become. But even so, trust must be earned/ and I failed that test. So, its fair. I just have to wait; until reality proves I do care enough to share the destiny of our lives as one. OR, maybe its me; unwilling to trust that female, will not try to enslave or destroy my life instead of love grows the heart. I admit; I have not trusted women for a very long time; “ a doctorate degree in; what women do”; rather ended that. But then there is all the love women bring as well; and life becomes a quandary of cost versus benefit. Which is judgment instead of the purity love must be, in order to survive, as the best we are, when cherished as one. “its complicated”.

something has changed, in me; I can feel it is true/ not certain what; time decides. No, this is not a blog or diary or other; it is simply an extension of the above story identifying my own participation.

it seems clear, that she has joined me; to encounter the essence of life inside of male; to see, “what our future could become”.  Another trading places. Men are again warned: NEVER come to me for anything to do with sex. Do not interfere; “between female and I”; its complicated. The cost will be beyond your ability to understand. ” a warning required of me, to give to you”/ I will not enforce it. Not “my warning”; take heed.

Balance accepts

that reality will not allow for the dams to be destroyed in favor of salmon populations of fish. They will not survive current conditions anyway; as the primary base food source for all northern and southern waters grows in the medium between fresh water and salt water found in ice flows.

Nonetheless; reality also allows that rivers can be altered to adjust for the small fry headed downstream to survive. By simply; adding in a funnel system where the river flows into the reservoir; before the water spreads out.

The basic configuration is a transparent or “lightened tubing” of whatever kind you like, that is flowing faster than the rest of the river/ by aiding that dimension with rocks or other that form a directional passage the majority of small fry will follow.

The lengthy tube is kept at the bottom of the reservoir/ and it flows out water through a special damn located under one of the flood gates used in the dam already there. You simply build what you need; place it into position behind the flood gate, and open the gate sufficiently when small fry are swimming through to allow that flow to exist in the tube. After the season is over; it can be closed; and if the tubing is anchored/ weighted/ specialized; correctly the flood gate can still be used.

The funnel entrance needs to be closed as well; when the season is over; so that nothing gets trapped; best you can.


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Jim Osterbur

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